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Health & Fitness

Working Mom: The Guilt Factor

I find it difficult to balance work and home life now that I am back to work full-time and drive an hour each way to and from my job.

In modern-day times, you find more and more households where both parents work, which is almost required if you have kids or just want to live slightly above poverty level.

I by no means want to be rich, but living "comfortably" is my goal. Living comfortable is a relative statement, I know. 

I have tried staying home and being a mom, both voluntarily and non-voluntarily. The upside is, I was able to get the kids to and from school, the house was always clean, and the kids always had clean underwear and matched socks. The downside is, we would always struggle financially. I became very good at juggling the bills and learning how to make the best of day-old bread! This was also the time when I thought I would start using coupons to help save a few bucks here and there.

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Each time, I began to realize that we were slipping into the financial black hole.  Bills were being paid just before disconnection and food was whatever was cheap and on sale. This certainly wasn't the way I wanted to live. Granted, it was nice being home and being able to stay on top of the cleaning, but it was not worth us having to downgrade our living standards.

Going back to work has been a difficult transition for me. I have three kids, two of which are still in school and one that needs to be pushed in order to get him to school.  When I was home I was able to constantly stand over him and move him through the phases of getting ready and I was able to drive him to school to ensure he was getting there and on time! 

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Now it is a different story. Not only am I at work, but I leave the house at 4:45 a.m. because I work in Costa Mesa and my start time is 6 a.m. This has been rough for me. I leave the house and my kids are still sleeping. I have to trust that they are going to get up, get ready and get to school on time.  I am lucky to have found another mom who stops by and picks up my middle-schooler and is able to get him to school safely and on time.

It is my high-schooler who is keeping me awake at night. I know he needs to be pushed and I know that he is extremely lazy and with me not being there to help push him along is keeping me awake and distracted. I feel that as a mom, it is my responsibility to be there and to help him. If you ask my husband, it is the kids' responsibility to get up and get going. The husband feels he should walk, ride a bike or find some other means of getting to school. I like the idea of him getting a ride because then I know he is not walking the streets in Elsinore and Wildomar.  Most of our street don't have sidewalks. 

What is a mother to do? We don't have any high school kids in the neighborhood that he can hitch a ride with. We only live 3.2 miles away from the high school so we don't have school bus access. I always want to do what I can for my kids. I feel guilty for not being able to afford the fun and expensive things they want and so I try to compensate in other areas. This is one of those areas. The other areas I might save for another blog topic.

I have and will again, resort to begging people on Facebook to get up early, if they don't already, and get my kid to school safely and on time.

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